I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
