ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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