So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Randomize
