cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Randomize
