When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
false alarm, still single
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
