i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Randomize
