I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
