so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
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