I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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