she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
