that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize