: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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