he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
