He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
