My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
