this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Rumble strips road head = magical
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Randomize
