so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Randomize