And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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