I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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