Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
