pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
