am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
