DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Randomize