i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
