A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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