The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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