He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Randomize
