all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
