I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
