how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
