My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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