Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
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