Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
