can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize