ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
Randomize
