Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
