I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
do nipples grow back?
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
