You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
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