i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Randomize
