Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Randomize
