Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
i now understand why vodka
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
