he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Randomize
