): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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