I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I want to fling myself into the sun
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
