Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Randomize
