Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize