i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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