Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Randomize
