You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Randomize
