"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
